sábado, 10 de octubre de 2009

Tanya

Tania (yes, her name is Tania even though the movie it’s spelled Tanya. Don’t ask) is a young teenage heiress who gets kidnapped by a militant political group in order to gain some ransom. While in custody, Tania is brainwashed into joining the terrorist group, participating in long ranty political discussions and, of course, hot 70’s sex.
As you can imagine, this was the first film version of the Patty Hearst case, and I find it more enjoyable than that ridiculously boring Paul Schrader version, Patty. Even with that said, the movie doesn’t have much of a plot. The movie begins with a long-haired newscaster who’s reading an introduction to the film with the script wide open. I’m not kidding, they’re not even trying to hide it like they did in “Blood Freak”, it’s right there in the table, wide open. After we see the guy reading off the script, we cut to the plot, which alternates between sex scenes, and scenes of the group talking politics. It goes like that, back and forth, until the end. The sex is half softcore, half hardcore. No blowjobs, no visible penetration, but the muff-diving is pretty much real. The men and women are all attractive in a plain sort of way, my favorite being the afro-haired white girl who gets it on with both men and women. Looks like a more rednecky version of Linda Lovelace. Only negative is that one of the terrorists that has sex is a slightly over-weight, balding redhead dude that gets it on with almost every girls. Some people just shouldn’t fuck on camera.
I’m sure if this movie had dared to go all the way, it would have been more famous, but it’s still pretty obscure, with only Something Weird Video being ballsy enough to release it as a double feature with “Wilbur and the Baby Factory” (ugh). By the way, check out the credits, they’re the funniest part: Director/Producer - P. Duncan Fingersnarl, Director of Photography - Otto Focus. The credits also claim that this film is based on a play called "Take My Virtue But Not My Dignity" which itself was supposedly based on a novel called "Daughter of an Empire, Mother of a Revolution" by Broderick Turntwist. What the fuck?

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